Sinister Cinnamon

I work in a corporation. Now in and of itself, this is not necessarily a bad thing. Unless you think you are going to need your soul somewhere down the road, that is.

I have a feeling that only people who have spent time in a major corporation will know what I mean. I compare it to the classic movie "Invasion of the Body Snatchers". In the film, an alien pod lands on Earth and begins taking over people's bodies, one by one. Once a person is taken over, they look and sound exactly the same, but act differently and only in the best interests of the aliens.

A similar thing happens in a corporation. The most mindless and banal things are said, and the majority of people nod their heads like it makes sense since they are bound to comply. Since they have been taken over by the pod people!! On an almost daily basis an event or rule change will come out, and I will inevitably ask myself (and the few people who have not yet been infected), how does this make any sense? No, seriously. I am not trying to be negative here. Let's pretend that we are CEO's, and are looking out for max profit, accountability and productivity. HOW DOES THIS MAKE ANY SENSE? But the majority of people will comply immediately with the most ridiculous and counter-productive orders of the collective as if it makes all the sense in the world, because this is what they have been programmed to do.

Now here's the salient point: I am not saying that people should defy the orders, as obviously they want to keep their jobs. I am simply saying that it might be human to question things that make no sense, or actually have an adverse affect on the company's profit, accountability and productivity. Now does this not MAKE SENSE? Perhaps there are 1, or 3, or 742 better ways to do this? Some days I walk in there and feel like I have entered the Twilight Zone. And I ask myself every day, is it me? Am I biased because I dislike the job? Do I have a bad attitude? Would I do a better job if I made the decisions? Actually, these may be bad examples because the answers are all yes. Nevertheless, people, the point still stands. CORPORATIONS ARE MENTALLY UNSTABLE.

I have been meaning to rent a documentary called "The Corporation" for some time now. I'm sure it's as good as advertised, but the problem is I already live it every day. The Corporation is like an unemotional sociopath driven to accomplish set goals no matter how harmful to the world, the employees, or the corporation itself. Resistance is futile.

A mass email went out a while back comparing cubicle jobs to prison cells, and everyone who reads it laughs out loud. Surrounded by "walls", a 15-minute break to get some sun, crappy cafeteria food, a day pass to quickly visit your bed before it's time to come back. It's funny cause it's true.

I do know this: it's about time I rented Office Space again, just to reaffirm my faith in humanity. There are other people out there who "get it". And like the lead character of "Invasion of the Body Snatchers", I am willing to run through highway traffic to find them.

A very interesting day here as I report from my bunker in an undisclosed location somewhere in Toronto, Canada. The weather has been unseasonably warm of late, it is fantastic to walk around and enjoy it until you start to wonder just how much of an impact global warming has had on weather patterns. There is no question that winter starts later and is milder than it was when I was younger. One thing for our oilmongers and "we need more study" peddlers to consider: even if global warming is a lie, cleaning up the environment with stiffer regulations will still improve the air we breathe and the water we drink, and force corporations to act responsibly. And if it is not a lie, then we are dooming ourselves and our descendents out of sheer stupidity and ignorance. It's the easier no-brainer in the history of decision-making.

In the world of sports, the Raptors made the history books yesterday. Unfortunately, it was for the wrong reason as they allowed Kobe Bryant to score 81 points on them, the second highest single-game point total EVER. I watched it all live, and it was incredible. Kobe is a selfish player and his teammates must hate playing with him, but he is skilled beyond belief and watching him drain three pointers off-balance with 2 guys draped all over him was a marvel to behold. Somehow the Raptors will need to regroup in a hurry since they play Denver tonight.

Then we have our lowly Toronto Maple Leafs, who have been blown out 3 times in a row by their arch-rivals, the Ottawa Senators, including a ridiculous 7-0 loss on Saturday night. They get the chance to play each other again tonight, and the result will tell us a lot about every single Leaf player, as well as their coach.

And finally, the Canadian federal election is happening today, and it seems inevitable that the people will elect Con Leader Stephen Harper as prime minister. A true embarrassment for anyone interested in moving forward into the 21st century, rather than regressing back into old arguments from the last one. Paul Martin brought this on himself, though, by being a wishy-washy "politician" and running a truly horrific campaign. The Las Vegas over-under on when Harper voters will regret their decision is six months.